Mooncake Festival

I just went back to KL last week for moon cake festival. It wasn’t my plan to go back. But, Mr Ang said it is a festive for family gathering, thus he encouraged me to go back and have dinner with his family. He is such a typical Chinese. Haha, i love it though. We had dinner at his auntie’s house, which are just couples of streets away from his house. We had prawns, chickens, ducks, mushrooms, ABC soup and vege for dinner. It was a great one.

I am leaving my current job and leaving Ipoh to KL for good. This is sad. I will miss dearly all the 3 doctors. They are my beloved persons in Ipoh. I always feel a kind of strange feeling towards them. For me, they are my gynaecology fathers. Nothing in OB & GYN will beat them up because they have been working for so long. They are the pioneers in this field in Ipoh and one of them apparently is one of the few doctors in Malaysia who knows how to do Wertheim’s hysterectomy and colposcopy. I really learn a lot from them. Being here for one year is not enough at all. However, i believe everywhere is a place for learning.

Sunday

There is this gospel song, of which i don’t know the title and original singer, of which the first 2 lines started with,

When the stage is bare tonight,

There’s no one else, just you and me...

These words touched my heart. It is true. When i reach home from all day’s work, it is only me and God. No one else. I don’t have to pretend to be someone else. I don’t need to talk, God already know my sorrow, my grief, my gratefulness, my happiness, my feeling... Life is so much harder for Christians. I have tried to put on smiley face and reassure myself that everything will be alright. But the reality is not so. However, i am still glad that i have God. He is my loyal listener, my soul mate. God knows i have uncountable unspoken stuff. He knows. He never gave up. He always show me the way and give me hope when i am at bottom. Thank you God.

Thoughts

Today Jia called to discuss about the condo expenses. I am a sonographer. If i am at any country but Malaysia and Singapore, i earn quite a lot, easily more than 5k. But in Malaysia and Singapore, sonographers are not so respected. Even the word sonographer is not in my Microsoft vista vocabulary! The word is underlined with wary red lines. But i chose to be in Malaysia. I am happy with the work here and i still have a lot to learn. Anywhere can be a learning place regardless how bad is the working condition. I believe that i will earn more in the future. But i need more time. Don't worry Jia, i will pay back one day. I know, for you it really doesn't really matter. But it matters to me.

1st Sept 2009

I was thinking when i drove back just now. Sometimes, i like to drive. Driving makes me think deeply. Driving gives me time to think things i never thought before.

I was sick after Tania came to visit me and Ummi. I knew it was just a normal cold and flu. But with the H1N1 viruses everywhere and flu viruses mutation every millisecond, somehow i thought of me getting the virus. There was a time that i got the flu and fever at the same time that cause some difficulties in movement and all my joints were aching. Then, i started to think ridiculously. What if i really got the flu and movement is really hard? Who will help me? Who will make sure i get healed? Shall i go back KL so that Mr Ang can take care of me? No, i should not, later they will get infected too. Then, how i get heal without people taking care of me? I am all alone here. Who to see? What to do? Bla bla bla... haha, now that i am healthy, when i think back, it was quite hilarious.

Then i thought about the fight that i had with Nong. Shit happened and people fight. In the end i still love her as my sister. If i were to choose my sisters again, i will still choose them. Angry words were said and can’t be taken back but forgiveness is given. I know things change after angry words were spoken, but i am a very hot temper person. I always try to change, i always do. Somehow, it doesn't work. Maybe i will change in the future after i was hit by a really expensive lesson. Or maybe i will wake up one day with my attitude totally changed. Maybe one day i was struck by lightning and got amnesia which cause my hot temper to disappear. Ah, maybe...

Gastric!

I always skip my breakfast. I believe that breakfast is the most important meal of the day but i just cannot bring so much food into my mouth so early in the morning! I usually will reach the clinic 15 minutes earlier. Since i am a slow eater, 15 minutes is never enough for me to have my breakfast. I still remember i could spend 1 hour eating in front of the TV or magazine. Thus, instead of eating in fast motion of my breakfast, i always skip them. Skipping the breakfast will cause me getting very hungry by lunch time. Getting VERY hungry is actually not good, it will cause you eat very fast without realizing it and you will easily end up indigestion or gastric. I never know the true meaning of gastric pain until a few days ago and i am still getting gastric pain until today. No matter if i am hungry or full, i still got the vague pain at my epigastrium region. The pain will only go if i lie down or i bent my body. If i stand or straighten my body, the pain will be there. Now i really have to watch out my diet. No more sour, spicy food if i am very hungry. No more cold drinks anytime during interval of meal. Everything must be taken warm without spiciness and sourness. This is suck!